My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize