Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize