apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
