I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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