I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
My ass is underappreciated
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
