i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
