Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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