remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
420 ftw
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize
