I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize