Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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