perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize