I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
