Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
