The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
