I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
