The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize