so explain again why im purple
no
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
