you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
