ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
