Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
His nipple licking is glorious
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