she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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