I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
