you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
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