Swine flu. Run for my life!
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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