Your tits are I can't wait for
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
