ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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