she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
