do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
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