i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize