In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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