ugly people sure do ruin things
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Randomize
