Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
