you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
