To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
