having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
