Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.

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(+43): View more from

After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.

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(512): View more from Texas

ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband

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(314): View more from Missouri

Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.

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(620): View more from Kansas

would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.

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(561): View more from Florida

I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.

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