Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize