My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
