I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
