you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
