Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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