would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
