stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
