i'm signing you up for texting rehab
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
