We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
