ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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