I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize