U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Are we still banned from the library?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
