how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
