the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
