Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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